Dr. Milan
Stankovic

Boundaries

You respect my vacations. I am responsible for showing up rested, present and intellectually available. I expect the same from you.

We are both adults i.e. you can depend on me and I can depend on you.

I don't provide validation. You act and you do the best you can. You don't wait for me to validate your choices.

You are responsible to choose the best course of your action that you believe will yield the best results. I can help clarify what best results are. I can give information. But it is you who has the intellect to choose the best course of action.

Same for me, I can receive information and ask to clarify. My results are a consequence of my effort allocation choices. It is usually not how you would have done things if you were me.

I don't listen to devil's advocates. Either you have an argument that you truly believe in and you can defend, or you won't be heard.

Time is my most precious resource. If you are on the receiving end of my time, I hold you accountable for what you do with it. It is OK to cancel meetings in advance, and to be a few (up to 15) minutes late.

I don't do meetings in the morning.

In addition to meetings, I also do work.

I value clarity of intentions, and questions that help clarify them.

I can believe in your best intentions only if you believe in my best intentions.

I know, better than you, what is best for me.

The moment you think “it’s easy for Milan”, you can be sure that our relationship has ended or it never in fact existed.

Sarcasm is not OK. Too often, it is hostility disguised as humor, used to mask pain, anger, or resentment. If you want to convey such feelings to me, please do it directly or do not do it at all.

I have a reading disorder i.e. I read several times slower than an average person. If you give me any books, make sure I've already decided to read them, or that they are composed primarily of pictures.